It was a year ago and months that's passed
A lot of "what ifs" questions for this unreal situation
Trying to be better everyday, that's what I've been praying for
And hopefully, my heart's home and just no more..
I've been feeling fine, even though I may have failed
Been working 24/7 just to forget and move on
But I'm only human, I'm still learning how to let go peacefully
Without the thought's of keep wanting you back
Cz babe, I know you won't
I always know that you won't
So many signs of me missing you
And probably the signs of you're missing me too
But still, we're on our own
Kill those fantasy of us, like it never happened before
We're just so good at keep training our heart and mind
So we won't need each other
Cz we don't need each other
The part when you left me was harsh
It's like an atomic bomb, or tornado, for impulsively swirling around my head or heart
Been trying few times to get you back but still I got nothing from you
Keep having this rough war inside my mind for you
for the question "stay or let go?"
What's in the world I didn't give except the distance that I can't argue about?
Sometimes I still think that I deadly need you here
Even though it feels impossible
It's funny how it turned out
I got lonely and feeling hot but
I still have that fierce, demonic wishes for wanting to be with you
Just let me have a peaceful night, and have that sweet dream even it's without you
Now I feel numb and just nothing
Even the worst part, I have to keep pretending
Acting so fucking fine like nothing happened for those around me
Call me I'm bluffing, I don't really care
Call me I'm lying, you'd always think about me that way
But one thing for sure, babe
I might lost you but there, I found myself
I've missed you so much but...
Saying goodbye won't hurt so much
Than have to stay when all you do is walking away
FFF
June, 20th 2024
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