my best mistake



Everything's just fine, here
Breathing the new air every morning
Sippin' on coffee while smokes are in the air 
I wish I could be back the way I used to be 
Living a happy, confused but exciting life 
While now, I'm just trapped into this cruel reality

They say to think twice before jump into a conclusion
I thought I found it, but it's only a delusion 
I am so caught up and burned in my own confusion
Should I tell it more so you'd understand?
I bet you won't,
I hope you won't

For someone that inspires me to write all this thoughts
Don't you know that I'm still waiting for the impossible to happen?

I still whisper to your name, remember how good it was when we're still together
Fight for nothing and end up with forgiving
Don't know if you feel the same or it's just me (to blame)
You look fine as nothing ever happened
While I, still walk in that path
Counting back those days and jailed inside my own misery

Maybe it's not pathetic at all
Maybe it's just the way my mind couldn't let go 
I wish I could let go and just fine 
Trying to find peace but I won't find one 
How could you've ever forgotten about us?
Never thought you're gonna be the one that break me this much
Cz for once, I never feel this way before 
You're always be my top runner, 
Even you don't have to compete 
Baby, you're my best mistake

So let me, just let me feel you once more
Swear I'll be the best like you always want me to be
In the night, babe
I realize that I'm not clean at all
I'm tired to always dream about you, or dancing with your ghost
Can't do me without you do it
Can't feel anything except you're here
It's so fucking tiring to fuck another only to feel alive 
I'm just like an empty shell without you here...


FFF
April, 20th 2024

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